2007? Or are you looking forward to being born again? Just kiddin' with you, welcome aboard!

-TC

Interesting, sounds a bit like an enhanced pantheism. Welcome aboard.

-TC

I think I did one of these earlier, but I'll update it now.

I was raised first Lutheran, then First Christian, then Methodist growing up through high school in various spots of the Midwest U.S. Was mostly for social purposes, and I really enjoyed my time and memories of it, especially the First Christian Church.

At KU (Kansas), I drifted more into an agnostic perspective with Christian leanings. Didn't really buy the mythical stories, still believed in the idea behind the sacrifice of Jesus, but not dogmatically. I never labeled myself agnostic, it just never really came up that much.

After college, I decided my view was more atheistic, and began to think of myself in that manner. Once again, never really investigated it, but with only theism as the alternative, atheism seemed more logical.

One day, I was approached with some literature from some born again Christians on their concept of "Heaven". I have to admit I was very intrigued and excited, the prospects seemed so fantastic. I decided to take some evangelicals up on a Bible Study one day. They were very nice people, but I realized the philosophy just ran at odds with mine too much. The literal interpretations seemed to allow too much to be taken on faith and text, and after reading more, I got turned off more.

This lasted for a short period of time when one slow and uneventful meeting, some friends of mine and I began "philosophizing" and exploring the "deep" questions. After digging a bit deeper, I drifted back into agnosticism, and identified myself as such. I was just beginning my career in the FAA, and the issue never really came up much.

Some years later, shortly after I was married, my wife asked me what religion or philosophy I believe in (oddly, it hadn't come up even after a year of marriage). I blindly said, "Christian, I guess", having completely forgotten by this time the agnosticism I had said was my outlook on the matter. She asked me, "How do you reconcile the Old Testament God with the New Testament God?" I said that it hadn't occurred to me to try. So, I read the Bible...all of it! I decided Jesus seemed like an OK guy, but the rest of it I just didn't identify with at all.

So, I began a quest, on religion and philosophy. My wife was a Neo-platonist, and I found myself enjoying the same. We explored and studied most of the major religions, using Huston's, The World's Religions, as the primary guide. We liked the idea of Jnanna Hinduism the best, but it was culturally very hard to identify with outside of the academic description.

I then came across Deism, and I immediately identified with it. I became a very active Deist over the following years, even helping to expand the realm and scope of Deism. I was also introduced to the works of Ken Wilber and Integral Philosophy. To make a long story short, I now identify myself as an Integral Panendeist. If you really want to know more on that, you can check out the beliefs forum workshops under Deist Beliefs.

Lately, I haven't been as vigilant in either my contemplative practices or my philosophy/theology studies in general. My workplace is severely short staffed, we're working mandatory six day weeks, and I'm training a bunch of the new hires, coupled with an hour commute each way, a daughter entering college, and a fourth grade son who wants to do everything from Scouts to drum lessons to Karate lessons, to Chess club, well, I'm a bit tired lately.

So, while my defense of spirituality is intense, often drawing the ire of materialists, my rationality burns just as much, making my critiques of historicity of mythical religious claims just as irritating to theists. In all, I try to be fair and respectful in any analysis or defense I give.

Are you still reading this? I would have given up a few paragraphs ago!

-TC

ok TC...if you thought one would give up reading before the end...then do tell...is it i who is crazy for the continued reading or you for the continued writing of thinking no one would finish reading.... ...my answer is ...we are all crazy...some just a little more so then others....i must say reading your post made me tired..so living it seems might be a bit exhausting...i do have one question...did i read correct above ...that your wife never ask your religious belief till after you were married....

Yep. We got married after about three weeks of dating, eloping in Vegas. We celebrate 10 years Sep. 7th!

-TC

WOW...well congratulations...just reading that this Sunday morning is a nice feeling....May you have oodles more and they be happy ones....

Hiya Travis, I meant UK date dd/mm/yy different to American

Well, I describe myself as a rogue panentheist, but in truth I'm somewhere between the two.

Thank you!

__________________
We do not fear the night, who have loved the stars so fondly.