Hello to all members and guests of interfaithforums. I am Gary Ferguson, “the friendly giant”. It is a pleasure to be here. I’ve been with you for about two weeks and already I’ve met some very interesting people with varied and uplifting ideas. I’d like to stay awhile and meet more of you so I guess I should introduce myself and share a little of the “I am” that I am.

I am 54 years of age, a chauffeur/janitor at a transportation company in Cape Breton, N.S. and I am well immersed in a spiritual path that was laid out for me in a vision in my 15th year. The vision showed me a unique perspective regarding the second coming and that Christhood was somehow linked to pouring out Truth upon the earth. It was all about oneness. From the moment I opened to the idea I realized that it was mine to understand and present for public consideration.

In March in 1996 I shared the idea with another person. Within 24 hours I experienced the first major increase to my spirit. Consequently I have a high degree of confidence that what I had shared is the Truth of us. I would like to share it here at interfaithforums for your consideration. I’ll begin with a few highlights from my early years. Then I’ll give you the vision as I experienced it. You may see it differently than I did. We can discuss it if you like. My path only requires that I be honest and truthful about everything.

My interest in God began in my fifth year. I heard or somehow became aware that God was everywhere and knew everything about everyone. I wondered how that could be possible. I believed it wholeheartedly but I just couldn’t understand it. I couldn’t wrap my mind around it. So I began to play with the idea. I would lie down on a lawn or in a field of grass and look up. I would think to myself. God is in that cloud and God is in that bird and God is in that tree. And God is in the space in-between me and that cloud and that bird and that tree. And God is in me and God is watching as I think these thoughts. And all of this is possible through this little body. I thought to myself. “This must be the greatest miracle of all.” My new awareness of God gave birth to the first desire I ever had that couldn’t be satisfied with a toy or a bag of candy. I wanted to know how God could be everywhere and know everything about everyone. I just wanted to know.

At mom’s insistence we were regulars at church every Sunday. We would arrive in time for Sunday school. When we were dismissed we would exit the back door of the church and walk along side the iron-picket fence that bordered the church grounds until we arrived at the front door of the church. There we would enter and take part in the morning service. But Sunday school was my favorite. That’s where we learned about Jesus. We would listen to stories about Jesus and gradually became aware of the things he had said and done.

One particular morning as we were dismissed from Sunday school I kept thinking about Jesus. He was the most amazing man I had ever heard of. I wondered what he knew. I wondered what it was like to be him. In my mind’s eye I imagined Jesus high up in the sky looking into empty space and gesturing as if in communication with someone who could not be seen. Then it occurred to me that Jesus probably had the best understanding of God. Jesus, more than anyone else, probably knew how God could be everywhere and know everything about everyone. A way to realize my first desire became clear to me. I decided. Believing as children do, that God was with us, inside and out, I addressed God in my heart.

“I want to know what Jesus knew. Please, Heavenly Father, you can take this life and use it any way you wish. But please, Heavenly Father, allow me to know what Jesus knew.” Immediately an idea arose in my mind and it was followed by a question. Jesus had died for His Service to God. Would I be willing to pay that price? Would I be willing to give my life? My answer was almost immediate. “Yes Father, I would give my life. I can’t imagine a better way to spend a life than to know what Jesus knew and serve as Jesus served.” The phrase “my life” jumped out at me and I remembered that God had created everything: even me. I amended my statement.

“I want to know what Jesus knew. Please, Heavenly Father, you can take this life and use it any way you wish. It’s yours anyway. But please Heavenly Father, cause me to know what Jesus knew.” As I surfaced from my address to God I was moving along side the iron-picket fence. As I made my way toward the northeast corner of the church property my head was bowed to avert the brilliance of the sun in the eastern sky. I was close to the corner when I thought to myself. "I wonder what I really will do in this life." Immediately three words in big block letters penetrated my awareness as if shot from the sun in the eastern sky. "WRITE A BOOK" compelled my attention. I stopped walking. Time stood still and I was empty of all else. This huge sign filled the length and breadth of my awareness. My mind remained fixed on these words and I struggled to understand. At this stage in my development I was still working on “see flip run”. The idea of writing a book had not even entered my mind. I glanced to my left as my internal response reflected my bewilderment. "What? Write a book? I can't write a book! I don't know anything."

I knew that I could not write a book. So I shook it off and returned to my senses. I began to walk again. I rounded the northeast corner and headed for the front door of the church. "O well", I thought. "Maybe I'll just be a teacher. I will learn something and then I will teach it." With that I bounded up the concrete steps and entered the church to meet with my family and take part in the morning service. A life altering moment had come to an end. A seed had been planted that would gestate until the appropriate season. It would surface again as a possible answer to a question asked in absolute misery.

I had 12 joyful and nearly perfect years. As I entered my 13th year, the joy ended. My world fell apart. I had been born male child to my parents and quite naturally expected that I would one day be a man. Then I experienced an aspect of female puberty. I developed breasts. I didn’t know what was happening to me. Something was wrong. I began to hide my physical form as best I could, even from my family, and kept begging God for an answer. I felt like I had stepped off the edge of a cliff and was falling and falling and falling. And all the while the misery kept getting deeper and deeper and I was becoming acquainted with absolute worthlessness.

In my 15th year I realized that “my” life was over. I had not gone through male puberty and it looked like I never would. I was both and I was neither and there was no place in this world for what I had become. I began to fear the humiliation that would be mine if my truth were known. I even became angry with God. I couldn’t understand why this had happened to me. I had been a good child. I had not even said a bad word. And now this!

Then one day in the deepest of my misery, as I pleaded with God again for understanding, the memory of the church incident floated through my mind. I had completely forgotten about it. I was sitting on the edge of my bed with my head in my hands when I began to connect my physical predicament and the church incident. I relived the memory. I had given my life to God to use as God wished. I wondered out loud. “Are you trying to tell me God that there is something about this form that you want me to understand (a light went on). Are you trying to tell me that there is something “right” about this physical form? (another light) And that’s what you want me to write about. But what could possibly be the point of this worthless physical f…?”

In mid-thought my mind opened. In my mind's eye I found myself looking down upon two parallel lines of humans standing on earth. One line was male. One was female. They stood facing each other about 10 feet apart. The lines extended to the horizons in both directions. Then there was motion. The lines began to move and in an instant they were moving at such high speed that the lines appeared to be solid. This continued long enough to give me the impression that the lines must extend all the way around the earth.

As I looked down upon the scene I noticed a change. The space between the two lines was closing. The narrowing of the gap continued until the two lines were almost touching. Then all motion slowed to a stop and there below me was the place where the two lines joined to become one. There at the end point was a human being standing and looking back over the gap as if to enclose it. The two had become one. That human being was male and female in one body: a male with breasts. An idea struck me. I would only have to go through male puberty to be that form. Maybe there is a point to this worthless physical form?

I looked back toward the other end and was there immediately. There at the beginning was Adam, standing as if to enclose the gap at the other end. Adam too, was male and female in one body. I realized that the First Adam and the Second Adam were like identical bookends enclosing the history of the human race. “God is evolving Godself”, I thought. Then my Christian roots kicked in with a conditioned assumption. “What a great way for Jesus to return”. I was thinking that everyone could see oneself as half of what he is. Then the implication of that thought came to rest firmly upon my shoulders.

I apologize to everyone for thinking what I thought. But what could I do? It seemed that God had taken me up on my offer. God had taken two years to empty me of every former thought I ever had about how life was supposed to be and then poured in a new thought. I really didn’t have a lot of options.

As I withdrew from the vision I was high on the blessing. Then I began to envision the life that lay before me and again I started to think with a rational and somewhat doubting mind. I needed more. If there is any Truth to the idea of Jesus returning to earth in the form of physical oneness, it must be mentioned somewhere in the Bible. So I opened a bible. It was a King James Version. It opened to a page in Ephesians. The page was entitled, “The New Man”. My heart danced with anticipation. I read down and there it was. “For he is our peace who hath made both one…” (Eph. 2:14) That did it for me. I knew that had I not experienced the vision I would not have opened to the new interpretation of that passage that now filled me. But of course, I was the only one who had to take it seriously. I was the only one who could not walk away from it. God had compelled my “undivided” attention. I wore the idea in flesh.

I confirmed to God that I would do whatever I have to do and experience whatever I have to experience to take the idea forward. So I hid my form and the idea that explained it. I said nothing to anyone and stayed busy filtering the world through the idea while asking God for clarification on every point. In March of 1996, about 2 months my 43rd birthday, I wrote to a TV pastor and shared the idea.

The next morning, at the end of a lucid dream, a spiritual wave passed through me at chest level. I felt and saw a light turn on in my heart and was jolted into wakefulness. With eyes wide open I was on my back in bed as waves of rapture flowed back and forth from my head to my toes. There was a turbulent sea inside of me as my spirit pulsated. It was absolutely thrilling. It was intense for about a minute. Then the wavelength began to shorten and the sea began to calm. The waves and the sensation gradually settled in just below my naval and vanished. The whole episode lasted about 2 minutes.

I was on a natural high all day. At noon the intensity was so overwhelming that without any intent on my part my minds’ focus dove down into my heart and I glimpsed the earth as if from the sun. I was in the world and the world was in me. In that moment I knew experientially that Jesus had been speaking specifically when he said, “I am the light of the world”.

My life changed that day because my awareness of whom I am changed that day. Each of us is spirit wearing flesh, the sun wearing earth, God in form. I am a simple person with a somewhat unusual life experience. All I can do is define who I am in the highest sense and share that with you. My thoughts expressed are no more and no less than my application to God for spiritual increase. If that helps you: great.

Sorry for the length of this introduction. My first open thread will be “What does enlightenment mean to you?” the question that drew me to this site. The second will be, “The Church of God, an independent perspective.” I hope you find these interesting and I hope I will still be welcome here at interfaithforums. Thank you.
Gary

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May Love live in you and through you

Thank you, Gary for this very interesting post. I'm looking forward to getting to know you. Have a great time on the forum.

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InterfaithForums.com-Where your ideas and beliefs count.

It is nice to be able to formally say welcome. I hope that you are enjoying yourself, and I look forward to your posts.

Thank you for sharing your personal awakening. Congratulations on your awareness and insight and may you manifest all God has lain ahead of you on your path. It seems you have made an exstaordinary start.

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Only Love Prevails,
Don

Dear Gary,
Thanks for sharing. Your life reminds me of Therese Neumann, the Cathlic Stigmatist. Therese did not eat anything but once a day a paper thin wafer the size of a small coin. One of the reasons she was on earth was to prove that man can live by God's invisible light, and not by food only.

It makes sense to me that spirit could/would reflect man and woman simultaneously : )

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May your awareness be perfection

Welcome Gary! Thanks for Sharing that yes i agree it is a miracle isn't it? You should check out the Course of Miracles it so far helped me out alot and discovered who i really was! This site is amazing look forward to your posts

Thank you for your warm welcome Lightkeeper and for being there with guidance for this newcomer. It is good to be here.
Gary

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May Love live in you and through you

Rev. Kelly
Thank you for your kind welcome. I haven’t read enough of past posts to get a feel for your perspective but I do look forward to getting to know you and your understanding. This is a great forum for growing through conversation and it is a pleasure to be here and make your acquaintance.
Gary

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May Love live in you and through you

Wwwdlhow27
Thank you for reading my lengthy introduction and for your warm thoughts. I believe that all evolution is movement toward Truth and oneness is the greatest Truth of all. I would like to introduce to the members of this website my thought that the purpose of all evolution has been to manifest oneness in physical form, inspire a greater awareness of the oneness of us all and spark the evolution of consciousness. My understanding of Truth may be new to many people so I thought it best to share the highlights of my earlier years and my unusual life experience to show that my understanding is rooted more in my physical experience and my experience of God than in the ego. I know that experience is the greatest teacher and if an individual is not experiencing oneness in form then my experience just seems “wrong”. But consciousness is integrated awareness; awareness that is integrated by the situation and life circumstance of a particular physical form. My physical experience opened me to my oneness with God and the oneness of mankind. Being male or female may not naturally do this. I am hoping that my experience will help others to look at life a new way.
Thank you for your kind welcome wwwdlhow27
Gary

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May Love live in you and through you

Thank you for understanding vivamis123
I believe we are here on earth to reflect God
And God is one.
Gary

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May Love live in you and through you