I loved your statement about marriage, Rev K! And I agree with just about all the posters here. What a wonderful thread on marriage! I, too, was divorced (after 14 years) and I empathize with Sendy's comments as well. Something I've carried with me since then is that NO relationship can be considered a failure. I wouldn't change my past or my marriage. I learned so much about myself during that time.

I don't think anyone goes into marriage expecting it to end, and I'm sure everyone does their best at the time. We're all going to end up in the same "place" anyway, so whether we change partners or learn our lessons with the same person, I think it's all "blessed." Just my humble opinion, of course!

Interesting! Tell me more.

I believe that the government shouldn't even recognize marriages. There shouldn't be marriage licenses or anything.

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"I fully comprehended the power of the human mind at the exact moment I came to the realization that I'm totally insane and have no idea what I'm talking about."

I agree Schizophretard. Why do I need a piece of paper to tell me with whom I want to spend my life with? I got married for tax reasons. Yes, we love eachother....but is it not enough just for us to know?

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May your awareness be perfection

Marriage is a legal contract! In today's society, we have this fantasy that marriage is all about love and choosing a life partner, etc. In reality, marriage is a legal proceeding, and as such is a contract, where the limit of the contract is life.

In the past, and in many developing countries today, marriages are arranged, and done so with the idea of financial gain in mind. A man who wanted to gain property or animals would marry the farmer's daughter. A man who wanted political power would marry the mayor's daughter, if the price could be afforded. Women were property and bought and sold as such.

Love was not part of the equation. Granted most marriage contracts included fidelity clauses, so the couple must be true to each other, but affairs abounded during this time. If you were caught, the price was high; including banning from the community, which was needed for survival, or in some areas, death especially if you were a woman.

In today's society, most marriages are made based on love and commitment, not financial or political gain. But there are still financial gains that marriage gives a person: additional insurance coverage, retirement benefits, tax relief, and so on and so forth. For those reasons, marriage is still the legal contract it once was.

Now, don't get me wrong. I love Kathy's essay on marriage and agree with its contents. But to get the full view of what marriage is and where the idea comes from....well, reading about the history helps.

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"Philosophy is a walk on a slippery rock
Religion is a smile on a dog."

I got married to my second wife because we love each other

Should she decide to leave at any point I will wish only happiness for her
Should she want everything we own, it is hers

Because I love her



You cant sign up to that or bring it about with a contract or via the fear of condemnation - Its in the heart and comes from realising that Love is given with no strings

You are right, you can't bring about love through a contract. Like you, I love my husband, and should something happen to him...well, that is a thought I would rather not have.

The problem is that marriage is not about love on a historic or legal sense, it is about power and money. Let's face it, when the state recognizes a marriage, it makes money....probably the best argument for the state to monitor it.

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"Philosophy is a walk on a slippery rock
Religion is a smile on a dog."